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October 1, 2003


Update on Collagen-Infused Beverages

Chrissy, a friend who just moved to LA, helped us track down some collagen-infused drinks, a phenomenon which we reported on the other day. Turns out you can buy this stuff called Collagen Nite Loss Ultra and Ello Corporation's "Liquid Body Solvent" that supposedly help you lose weight and "have a healthier appearance by improving the growth of skin, hair, and nails." You add a half-ounce of the stuff to a glass of water, and then you can be just as good looking as your favorite C-list celebrity. Concerned that you might be getting some nasty Third World collagen? Have no fears: Collagen Nite Loss Ultra uses only "hydrolyzed collagen, from the United States." You must always buy AMERICAN hydrolized collagen to mix into your bottled water. Otherwise, the terrorists win.

Reading the rationale behind why collagen drinks are supposed to work is sort of like reading the manifesto of a crazy person. The individual points makes perfect sense, so it doesn't matter if the conclusions are absurd. To paraphrase Amy, you sort of get the sense they're telling you to change your hair color by drinking Clairol.

Chrissy suggests Googling "+collagen +weight +drink" and "collagen infused fruit juice." References to infused fruit juice show up in Google, but when you go to the actual pages, there's nothing there but long lists of random products and surgeries that people might be searching for. Not losing weight fast enough? Maybe you should try another one of Ello's flagship products: "Amphetra". Yeah...Amphetra. I think I had some of that at Twilo that time I raved for 128 straight hours and allegedly killed that club kid.

But you know what? I never looked so trim!

categories: Health
posted by adm at 4:56 PM | #


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