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March 1, 2006

robot

Show us your man-tits!

It brought a smile to my face to see the hordes of elaborately costumed locals and beefy red-faced tourists all cavorting around the French Quarter and getting drunk together for Mardi Gras this year. And it brought a heave to my stomach to see all the celebrities who joined the parade, who all seem to look a little less beautiful and a lot more bloated than usual without their professional makeup artists, hairstylists, lighting designers, and photographers around.

Some of the these photos are so unrecognizable they could almost be a Who'dat?™.

There's Sean Astin, who appears to be morphing into Tyne Daly,

Sean Astin

Steven Seagal, with a hefty dollop of Tom Jones and John Goodman in there somewhere,

Steven Seagal

Josh Hartnett, miserable grease-ball,

Josh Hartnett

Dan Aykroyd, who is actually looking just as terrible as he always does,

Dan Aykroyd

Michael Keaton in a shiny white Elvis jumpsuit and Jack Nicholson mask,

Michael Keaton

Anderson Cooper, who somehow still looks as put-together and handsome as ever,

Anderson Cooper

and the always-debonair Sean Connery in a super-sexy Mardi Gras costume.

some weirdo at Mardi Gras

categories: Celebrities, Culture
posted by amy at 1:05 PM | #

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Comments

Folks:

Doesn't this seems a little shallow? Just asking...

Posted by: thoreau at March 2, 2006 2:33 PM

amy's robot? shallow?

thoreau, that's what we do here. we also do things where we are not being shallow. the two are not mutually exclusive.

do you mean we're being shallow because we're commenting on the way these celebrities look, or because we're not writing about the more "meaningful" aspects of how great it is that all these famous rich people went to NOLA to get it back on its feet and then leave two days later, etc.

if it's the first one, the whole reason they're down there and getting their pictures taken is that they are celebrities. celebrity culture, by its nature is -- surprise! -- shallow, so i don't think we need to feel too guilty about picking on them for the way they look in bad photos.

if, on the other hand, you mean the second one, then, my response is a little different.

i know i'm not saying anything new here, and i'm not directing this just at you (esp. since i'm not sure what you specifically meant in your comment), but your comment gives me the opportunity to discuss this...

everybody gets all bent out of shape if some normal person does something that is shallow or makes light of something that "MATTERS" or is "IMPORTANT". but the reality is that the gigantic media companies that are being all solemn about 9/11 and katrina and the war and what not are COMMODIFYING IT and being deceitful about that fact, which in my mind is one thousand million times worse than someone making light of something or responding to it in a boldfacedly detached manner.

the solemn newscasters are ACTING. it's all fake, and it's all commodified. and if the whole world doesn't sign up and intone in the same ways, it's like "You're not taking it seriously." bullshit.

it's the people on the news and in the media who aren't taking it seriously. the meaning of whatever it is that's being covered has already been undercut just by their talking about it and making fancy graphics and moving on to whatever story is big the next day. product cycles.

i know i'm not the first person to observe this, the product cycle/commodification stuff i mean. i'm just saying that MSM and culture just needs to call it what it is, and stop giving people a hard time and banishing them and judging them just because they have a detached response. EVERYONE's response is detached, unless you are experiencing the suffering yourself, and just because *you are expressing something with detachment does not mean you are wholly detached*.

besides all that, if sean connery dresses up like a naked woman and parades his exposed latex tits around a city that has been utterly devastated by recent tragic events -- events that we feel just awful about, by the way -- isn't HE the one who's being shallow? That guy's a disgrace.

Posted by: ADM at March 3, 2006 2:37 PM

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