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October 21, 2009
New Catholic membership campaign
You like being an Anglican, but you're not so thrilled about gender equality and gay people messing up your church.
Now's the time to let Catholicism wrap you up in the warm embrace of sexism and homophobia! No forward-thinking here -- just centuries of bigotry and denial.
Here with the Catholics, conservative Anglicans can still enjoy priests whose sexuality, gay or straight, has been kept hidden until it turns into something sick and illegal. And women who want to participate in the church can do so through only the following roles:
-nurse
-teacher
-choir leader
-secret lover of priests who gets to raise their child in secret with tightfisted financial support.
We're waiting for you!
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Comments
I'm relieved to see at least one mainline religion still has its values and priorities in the right place.
Posted by: amy at October 26, 2009 12:31 PM
I'll stop being 'lapsed' when the Pope takes Sarah Silverman's advice:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bObItmxAGc
Posted by: sheila at November 11, 2009 10:51 PM
Jeez, have at 'em, I say. Still, they won't have much luck getting Anglicans to go full Catholic if they can't guarantee service in under one hour.
Now that's a blasphemy, at least for Episcopalians.
Posted by: ORStylee at October 22, 2009 8:44 AM