May 23, 2006
24 season finale: slow boat to China
Some of my very favorite scenes on 24 are the ones where Kiefer has to help someone unskilled in murder to violently kill someone, which he often does over the phone. "Now fire the gun again, Kim," he said to his screechy daughter in season 2, when she had to shoot her child-abusing old lecherous bastard of an employer. But his failure to say, "... and now turn that gun on yourself, Kim," sort of ruined the moment for me.
Last night's season finale included an excellent iteration of this scene, this time on the phone with Petty Officer Rooney, a naval engineer who said he wasn't trailed in combat. Kiefer talked him through slitting the throat of a Russian terrorist, telling him just how to pull his head back and how to move the knife: "Do it fast; do it deep." Rawrr! Petty Officer Rooney slit that Russian's throat like he'd been doing it his whole life, adding a few Adam's apple stabs for good measure. Way to go!
And even though it came a season late, I was delighted to maybe finally get my wish to see Kiefer break out of a Chinese prison camp--something I'd wished for at the end of last season. When a guy like Kiefer begs the Chinese guys who are holding him "Kill me. Just kill me," you know it's serious.
All that stuff about "we Chinese have very long memories" was pretty awkward though. What, they hadn't forgotten about this guy who got their consul killed a whole 18 months later? Wowee. At least they didn't add any more lines like "Our people have been producing the finest porcelain vases for thousands of years! And who do you think originated all those delicious noodle recipes? You gotta get up pretty early in the morning to pull one over on us Chinese, the people with very long memories!"
Next season: maybe Audrey will finally die.
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